Respect is so important. I firmly believe in the basic respect of manners and being good to people, unless they’ve given you a solid reason not to be. Even then, I believe it’s best to remove yourself from their toxicity if you can. I do get stressed and angry about injustices and people being horrid to others who have done nothing to them, and I hate how toxic behaviour and being judgemental seems to be becoming more normalised of late.
While I believe in basic respect when meeting people etc. I also firmly believe that respect is mostly earned. Yes I’ll say my pleases and my thank yous, but if you for example, are rude to service staff, don’t expect me to respect you, because I won’t.
Respect in relationships is so important. How can you be with someone if you don’t even respect them? Let alone attracted to them, romantically or otherwise?
One of things I really love about my relationship is that there is so much respect there. Respect and trust go hand in hand with us. It’s not forced or reiterated, it just is. We respect each other in ourselves and our relationship that we support each other in the ways we need to in a long-term, committed relationship. There are many things I respect about him. His work ethic, his commitment to family, how good he is with children and animals, and the fact that underneath all the toughness he shows to the outside world, he is a big softie with me.
Sexually speaking, again, respect and trust go hand in hand. I respect how he is very much dedicated to putting my pleasure before his own, even though of course, I want him to feel pleasure as well! He wants to make sure during sex, I come first, before he does, as he doesn’t want to feel like it’s all about him and to leave me high and dry.
As well, I deeply respect how he is adiment on communication. In the first few years of our relationship, communicating my wants and needs clearly was not my forte. I’d be the type to go to bed angry if an argument was had. To run away from the problem after the bomb had dropped so to speak, coming back when the dust had cleared. He refused to do this. He would physically sit me down and have us talk, not going to bed until we talked everything through and sorted whatever disagreement we had, out.
Considering when we started dating, it was at a point in my life when I was rebelling and flying off the rails so to speak, he has calmed me down an awful lot. He taught me how to communicate properly and not to do what a lot of couples I knew previously do: hold a grudge over trivial things.
Communication for me, is essential for respect. It reinforces the respect in my relationship. It reinforces the trust.
He has taught me many things over the years we have been together, and hope he continues to teach me for many years to come.
Becoming Violet Grey 
Beautiful post. so many things to say. Respect is very important and communication is a key as well. I like the way he sat with you to discuss things, to make sure you never went to bed angry.
Letting things lie wll eventually lead to resentment and can lead to loss of respect.
And once you cross of the line of respect, it is rare that you get it back.
May I ask how long you have been together? Sorry for prying.
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Thank you Drew ❤️ It’s one of the biggest things to un-learn and learn to be in a relationship that is healthy. My previous one before wasn’t exactly that!
No worries you’re not prying at all 😊 We’ve been together for nearly five years now. We met and started dating when I was 20, almost 21 😊 xx
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You mentioned the unlearn and learn. That is a very big thing. I always tell my friends, when a relationship ends. you need to wait before getting into the next one. To insure you don’t carry over past anger or bad habits from one relationship to the next.
Five years. That is a good aount of time. Happy for you. Alway keep it fresh. Don’t ever let the routine ruin the shine.
Hope I don’t offend you with what I am about to say, you have wisdom beyond your age. That is very refreshing in someone from your generation. Good head on your shoulders.
Have a great night.
xo
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Oh my God how could I possibly be offended by that? That’s a wonderful thing to say! Thank you! 😀 If I could jump over to the Dominican Republic and give you a hug I would. 😊
I agree, but also when it happens it happens. Go along for the ride and see what happens 😊
With me it took me a lot of therapy and help to un-learn a lot of the triggers and responses from my last relationship, but bearing in mind I was technically clinically traumatised (he didn’t turn out to be a nice man, and given we’d been very close friends for years that really screwed with me and what he did) so my case is a little different there. But generally speaking, I completely agree. Take some time for yourself, don’t go rushing into something just because you feel you ‘have’ to be in a relationship.
And thank you, I’ll be sure to! 😊 He’s a big softie with animals so all I have to do is take him to a farm where there’s lambs and donkeys and he’s gone! 😂 Xx
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Thank you so much for joining in the Tell Me About prompt. This is a brilliant post about respect and I agree with you! I hate it when people are rude to service staff. I really enjoyed reading this too, although I generally enjoy all your posts so I’m not really surprised!!!
Sweetgirl x
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I do think that communication is the underpin of any good relationship
xx
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I couldn’t agree more 😊 It’s like building a strong foundation for your home. No matter how pretty or extravagant it is, you got a weak foundation chances are it’s going to fall apart pretty quick x
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I do agree with you on everything you said, form the fact that disrespect almost seem to become the norm in some places, to the importance of communication. I just can’t live my life without being respectful.
Rebel xox
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Thank you, Marie 🙂 I’m personally a sucker for that Texas style respect. ‘Sir’ ‘Ma’am’ etc. Manners don’t cost a penny xx
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This is a lovely post Violet and i really like the way you show that you partner has shaped your view of respect through the way that you see together. A great read 😊
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Thank you missy! 😊
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For me, respect also goes hand in hand with trust in my relationship, so I get where you are coming from. And I so agree, communication is very important, and I am glad to hear that you are able to communicate properly in your relationship!
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Thank DS! 🙂 We’ve seen it happen to quite a few people around us where they could have avoided massive bust ups if they’d just talked to each other. So we try to avoid that as much as possible. Not to say we’re perfect though by any stretch! We have disagreements, bicker and argue at times like any other couple! x
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