This picture is one of my favourites I’ve found on the internet and sums up how I view my relationship with my boyfriend. He is a protector and provider. He is my rock. My lover. My best friend who I can be my weird self with. In his arms I feel safe and I’m home.
I’m a romantic at heart. A hopeless romantic if you will. I grew up enthralled with the fairytale princess getting her prince and living happily ever after. As I became an adult, I hid copies of Mills & Boon books under my bed, as I started reading steamier romantic novels.
Just the other day before I saw this prompt, I was thinking about the love letters me and my boyfriend wrote each other when we first started dating. I keep them squirreled away in a special box where I can look over the words of two people newly in love. When me and my boyfriend started seeing each other, our feelings for the other hit us like a truck.
When we got together, we fell deep and hard in love. While it’s easy to fall into the rose-tinted glasses of a whirlwind romance, I knew deep down I loved him, and considering I hadn’t known him for very long if any time at all, that frightened me stiff.
My usual experiences were with men who said they respected the fact I didn’t have casual sex, didn’t drink, do this or that etc. then try and push things when we became more involved, expecting me to change that, just for them. So when this guy comes out of nowhere, treats me with genuine respect, doesn’t treat me like some sort of ‘challenge’, and I feel like I can be completely myself around him? My instinct was to run screaming!
Long story short: after one night together at a bar that turned into cuddles on their Chesterfield couch, I couldn’t ignore my feelings anymore. Later that night I was making out with him in the back of his car at 3am. With the feelings came the physical action. It lead to some steamy cuddle time under blankets in the country when we went out for a picnic, the same day we told each other that we loved each other. More clothed sexy time in the back of his car where we fogged up all the windows, and making love for the first time not long after.
His letters from that time are especially dear to me. A fortnight into our new relationship, he took me out to dinner to celebrate my university results. We got all dressed up and he picked me up after work. In the car, we exchanged letters. We sat in silence, hand in hand as we read our feelings on the pages. I nearly cried with what he wrote to me. And I still keep all the cards he gifts me for birthdays, anniversaries and Valentine’s Day.
Four and a half years later and now much more settled in our relationship, our romantic gestures are everyday in our words and actions. We love and care about each other deeply and want to let the other know that. I firmly believe it’s the ‘little things’ that keeps the romance and spark alive in a relationship. In many ways we’re quite old-school in our relationship.
He enjoys taking me out and spoiling me, and I enjoy spoiling him. He’s very much of the protector and provider role and he wants to look after me. So I let him. Our running jokes include him making me as small and adorable sounding as possible, so he feels even more so of the protector and provider. I enjoy it, and I enjoy looking after him in what ways I do. We play to each other’s strengths, which for us, happen to be a little more on the traditional side of an otherwise very modern relationship.
He’ll open the door for me and walk on the road side of the pavement. I’ll cook us a meal for when he gets home from a long day at work, do things around the house so he doesn’t have to stress about it when he gets back. etc. If it’s not through little gifts or outings it’s through lots of kisses and cuddles, even to the point where he’s laughing, ‘Put me down, woman!!’
The little things are in fact the big things.It’s in the cuddles and telling the other we love them multiple times a day. It’s in going out to places that are special for us, be it breakfast at a local farm or going somewhere out in the country. The little gifts ‘just because’, our running jokes, and when he sleepily pulls me into a cuddle in bed in the middle of the night. That feeling I get when he does that is the best.
When it comes to Valentine’s Day, he’s very much the ‘Valentine’s should be every day in a relationship’ guy and I wholeheartedly agree. Having said that, despite us saying we’ll not do gifts or cards for the holiday, we’ll still do it anyway 😂
I could go on and on about us, but I’ll end up writing an entire essay! So I’ll just round it off here by saying that I love him very much, and want our ‘little things’ to continue for as long as possible. x