“Wanking is only two letters away from working!” – Amy Norton

Hi, I’m Violet and I’m a sex blogger. Part of being a sex blogger is sometimes reviewing sexy products and writing sexy stories. So is wanking…working?

For me, sometimes. Because of my reviewing of sex toys, reviewing these products mean getting a little personal with yourself. If I’m reviewing a vibrator, I’m reviewing it for its purpose: to provide sexual pleasure.

For the most part, my masturbatory adventures is not where I’m analysing the vibrations, body safety, cleaning and sanitising, how it works on my own body (a sex toy holy grail for me, may be a no-go for someone else) etc. However, that doesn’t mean I don’t find my ‘work wanks’ enjoyable, because believe me, I do!

As well, it’s not just sex toys. Being an erotica writer, I spend most of my time thinking up new scenarios for an erotic setting. Will it be romantic? Will it be just pure filth? Will there be BDSM, a Friends to Lovers story or a mixture of all of the above? So as you can imagine, daydreaming sexy situations, along with an already high sex drive, leaves me in a perpetual state of horniness.

Erotica writing is primarily where I’m at right now, but contrary to popular belief, along with some snobbery from the regular writing community, Erotica is by no means easy to write. You still need your character and plot developments, sense of time, exposition, structure etc. etc. So there’s a lot of thought and work that goes into it. Because sex is primary plot point, doesn’t make it any less worthy of being considered writing.

Sex is notoriously difficult to write. Remember The Guardian’s annual ‘bad sex’ award for writers? Yeah, you don’t want to end up there, unless that’s the actual goal: to deliberately do a satirical take on the genre to create the worst cliche-filled sex scene in this history of literature.

It is easy to fall back on well known tropes and stereotypes. I admit, I’ve done it more times than I can count, and to be honest still do at times. Reason being? They work. For example, Friends to Lovers? Classic trope that never gets old to guarantee the warmth and fuzziness in one’s belly. Strangers to Lovers? Same for naughty, forbidden hotness. Experimenting with kink for the first time? You get the idea…

Erotica is about so much more than ‘That goes in there. He jackhammer thrusts with no foreplay. He comes. She comes. Everyone had a great time. The End.’

It’s about how the characters feel, how it makes you and the reader feel. It’s about creating visceral imagery that ignites the senses and sparks some feeling. Taste, touch, hearing, sight, smell, all of it. The research if we’re going into topics like bondage. A kiss. A caress. A simple touch. What’s safe and what isn’t. Designed to titillate and arouse. The way they feel about each other and how their sexual desires build into a vivid and visceral crescendo…

Aaaaaaannnndddd I’m horny again.

Dammit.

*If you like what I do and want to support me and my blog, please consider supporting me on my Ko-Fi page, where your contribution will help continue my being able to write, (I’ve recently gone full-time due to the COVID19 pandemic) hosting writing classes and be able to help re-jig and update my blog in the long term. Thank you very much!

ALSO…

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